Thursday, October 27, 2011

Rebuilding Trust

Once trust is broken it is difficult to rebuild it… but it is possible!

When I’ve counseled people… usually married couples… where one’s conduct has deeply wounded the trust factor, I tell them it can only be repaired one way: By observation over time.

Here’s what that means…

Let’s say a husband has wounded his wife’s trust in him. That means to rebuild it he must:

Willingly and gladly allow her to go through his wallet, car, files, and/or desk any time she wants…

Willingly and gladly allow her to check his text messages and emails any time (She gets all his passwords)…

Willingly and gladly allow her to check up on him by going to wherever he said he’d be at any time…

Willingly and gladly allow her to question him on and/or about anything and answer honestly without animosity…

Willingly and gladly do all these things for at least a year… if not for the rest of his life.

Seem harsh? It isn’t. When a person has nothing to hide they won’t mind.

When a person wants to regain a person’s trust they’ll do whatever is required of them (Read 2 Cor 7:10-11 CLOSELY!).

Actually every spouse should be more than happy to do even if trust hasn’t been broken.

Do you need to rebuild someone’s trust in you? Offer this plan to them.

Do you need to trust someone else again? Suggest to them that if they want you to trust them again this is what it will take. My by-word here is… Trust, but verify.

 My thanks to Pastor Ron... I repost this from his blog.